Hack Attack©®™

You're not as safe as you think you are... no, no, thats not me creaking on the front porch, turn back to your computer monitor. Thats right, it turns out its super easy to break into a Windows computer. How do I know this? Well, it started when the computer that controls one of our research group's electron microscopes went down. The company replaced the computer, but wouldn't tell us the administrative password for our own computer. So, ala Senor Da Vinci, we now had a code to crack. To find out how, you could just google Cracking Windows 2000, but I'll save you the trouble (prepare for major geekdom ahead).

1) Create a DOS boot disk (if you kept reading after DOS, I suggest you quit while you are still ahead)

2) Realize that DOS can't read new Windows 2000 storage formats, then realize that this may the first time in five years that someone has refered to the year 2000 as "new."

3) Make a Linux boot disk (whoa, we are into some serious nerd territory now, as an interesting factoid for anyone still reading; I used to prefer NERDS at the pool in the summertime over the frozen snickers, NERDS make little kid's wet hands turn all different colors)

4) Copy the password files onto a disk and start a brute force cracking program (just like Sir Edward Furlong uses in Terminator Dos to break into an Automatic Teller Machine.)

5) Realize that the Linux boot disk came with asteroids installed, mercilously taunt Tom when you beat his high score then cry shamelessly when he gets to level four and doubles your high score.

6) 15 minutes later use the password to break into Windows.

Marketable skills to add to resume: Superhacker abilities on the level of Sandra Bullock

Marketable skill to remove from resume: Asteroids high score